For the Sake of Art

To practice any art, not matter how well or how badly, is to make your soul grow.”

Kurt Vonnegut

As a young girl, I used to spend the majority of my free moments writing short, fictional stories and then illustrating them. I could do this for hours, lost in my own imaginary world, pouring whimsical ideas onto the page. When finished, I’d bind my stories with colored construction paper and staples, making little books. In second grade, for show and tell, I filled a trash bag with these stories and proceeded to dump them onto my classroom floor, describing to my classmates what I’d created with my own hands. I loved to paint and to draw, and my artwork was pinned all throughout my parent’s kitchen. I danced regularly – coming up with my own choreography to Brittany and Shania’s latest hits. Art, creativity, and self-expression were seamlessly interwoven into my days, as natural to me as breathing.

As I moved through my adolescence and into my teen years, I had less and less time at my disposal. Between AP classes and after school sports, the only writing that I managed to do was for my classes. Drawing and painting became frivolous luxuries of time that I no longer had. Dance was now something that I reserved for the occasional weekend in my high school’s gym. No longer did there seem to be space in my life to create art simply for the sake of creating art. 

Lately I have spent a lot of time thinking about this concept of “highest version of self”, reflecting and writing on how this woman (who is me) moves through the world. One thing that continues to pop up for me is that she is an artist – a creator. I romanticize myself dressed in bright, flowy clothing with a paintbrush in hand. I see myself writing in the early hours of the morning, before the rest of the world wakes. I envision myself drawing, designing beautiful cards for all occasions. The yearning is there to put my creative energy to use as I construct beauty all around me.

While I see this for myself, imagining a more “actualized” me who is engaged in such artistic pursuit, actually prioritizing time for art in my life proves challenging. I can set aside the time to write this blog because I am sharing it with the world, and I feel a sort of responsibility to continue to put it out on a weekly basis. But setting aside time to paint simply because I love painting is extremely difficult. It is so much easier to pull out my phone and scroll through Instagram at the end of the day.

Why?

I think a large part of me feels like if I am going to spend time doing “art”, then I need to be using this time to produce art of “worth” – art that can be either monetized, gifted, shared with the world in some meaningful way. If I am not making money from it, or gifting it to another, then what is the point? How can I justify time spent in playful creation? 

“A simple line painted with the brush can lead to freedom and happiness.

Joan Miro 

My own guilt around investing time toward art simply for the sake of doing art is what keeps me from living out the truest expression of myself. In fact, my wellbeing is compromised by my inability to simply allow myself t0  sit and play with a basket of acrylic paint and a blank canvas. There is actual science to back me up on this claim, “Seeing a completed work of art stimulates the release of dopamine – the feel good hormone – into our bodies, which lowers feelings of depression and increases feelings of confidence” [University of Victoria]. If you google “benefits of performing art” the results are astounding. One could argue that regular creative expression is just as critical to our health as is regular exercise and balanced eating habits. 

For myself, I have observed that every time I sit down to write a blog draft it is as though a weight has been lifted from me. I am met with such relief after putting voice to, and creating meaning from, my experiences. There is a sense of accomplishment in the discipline I’ve established in order to sit down and write something cohesive each week, which in turn contributes to my own sense of confidence and an ability to prioritize myself. When I paint, I notice that I feel calmer afterwards, all of my anxious energy having left my body through the strokes of the brush. Time spent creating in this way, making art just for myself, for others to enjoy if they so please, is also a lot of fun. For me, it is a form of play, something that is missing from so many of the hours in my day. 

How do I let go of my own guilt and create more room in my life for artistic expression? Acknowledging all of the positive benefits of such an act certainly helps. I also think there is something so enticing about seeing one’s life as a blank canvas upon which to paint, or a page to be filled, leaving room for bits of self expression and creativity to be sprinkled into each day. 

Walking without my phone and taking notice of the beauty of the natural world around me; taking photos of interesting things that I see, or moments that I want to remember; putting together an upbeat playlist for Monday mornings; baking a new cookie recipe; rearranging decor or furniture in my home – these are all forms of art when completed with intention and presence. In addition to this, just like I prioritize and set aside time each week to write this blog, I can set aside time to pull out my paints or colored pencils and just play. 

We all have full lives, many of us balancing multiple commitments, our minds and souls left fragmented as we are pulled in so many directions. Yet, time spent in the mode of creation allows for us to put the pieces of ourselves back together, to sharpen our focus on life and in turn find greater meaning in what before appeared to be chaos. 

How much time do you devote to your art (whatever that may be for you)? What benefits are you missing out on as a result? I challenge you this week to consider how you can create more space for artistic expression in your days. I will be right there with you. I have a feeling that our souls will be ever so thankful ♡.